Third Age: Episode 14
"Hacki" is the 14th episode of the Third Age Fanfic. ---- After a few days of finding Hacki, he was finally shown. He is taken by a pirate named Albuquerque. ---- Albquerque: This guy has bigass bags. I'm curious of what's inside. Maybe this guy will lead us to riches! Pirate 1: You cannot enter the land of milk and honey without passing a land of sand and thorns! Albuquerque: Ohhh... I understand what you said. But I've never heard of someone as poetical as you. We pirates don't need poets like you here! Talk about metaphor shit again and you walk on the plank! Pirate 1: Sorry, captain! But I'm your first mate, remember? Albuquerque: I ain't got time arguing this shit, you prickass! Pirate 1: My name is Fonso, dammit! Albuquerque: Whatever, Fonso. I don't even care about you and your reputation. All I've got is this. If Hacki breaks lose of your defense, I'll make sure you'll jump to the sea because of my special surprise for 'ya!. Fonso: No, not that thing, captain! Albuquerque: Yes, I will do that. So... GET YOUR FUCKING ASS OVER THERE!!! Hacki wakes up, tied to the ship's mast. Hacki: Where the hell am I?! Why am I tied?! Albuquerque: Welcome to my humble ship, you scum! As you see, you're in my ship! All you have to do is to sit back, relax and enjoy the ride! Hacki: Where is Jonathan and Johanne? Albuquerque: Who's Jonathan and Johanne? Fonso?! Fonso: I think Jonathan's the overpowered swordsman guy from earlier and Johanne is the beautiful girl with him. Albuquerque: Oh, yeah. I see. There are really good things happening in this island. What you said is true. There is no victory without challenge? That's what you mean, right? Fonso (doing a salute in an awkward manner): Uhh... Yes, captain! Albuquerque: Don't worry. They're fine. They are still free and you cannot even find them on this ship. But we want to catch them like the riches of yer island. YAHAHAHAHA!!! Hacki: Not even funny! ---- Hours later, nighttime has fallen over the island. The two are sitting on a rock, waiting for any sign of Hacki. Jonathan: I feel so bored, can we get home already? We just keep doing nothing here. Johanne: I know what you're feeling too... but we need to wait a little more. Jonathan: For what? You thought Hacki's coming back? Johanne: Yes, Jona-''kun''! I always know that Hacki's coming back! Can't you wait for like five minutes or something? After ten more minutes, if he didn't show up, we'll be coming home! Jonathan: Yeah, whatever. Johana-''chan''. Thirty minutes passed, it is already nighttime and it is dangerous to take the road back to their house. Jonathan also fell asleep. Johanne: Jonathan, hey! Jonathan, wake up! Jonathan: Johanne... *stretches* uh! Did you see Hacki already? Johanne: No, we're coming home already. Jonathan: Finally. That wait was just insane! ---- Jonathan: What will I cook? Johanne: Can you let me cook for tonight? Just for this night. Jonathan (holds Johanne's hands): Be careful with your cooking. Your beautiful hands might get burned. Johanne: Jonathan... hahahaha! Are you serious with that? Jonathan: Oh, come on! Do you even meme? Johanne: Yeah, but I'm serious with this. Thanks for the complement, big bro. Jonathan: You're welcome, little sis. You know I'm not joking with that thing, right? Jonathan stops talking to Johanne and starts reading some books from the shelf. He picked up an Algebra book. After a few minutes... Jonathan: I won't have time and patience to understand this bullshit... Jonathan sleeps on the dining table. Johanne: Heeeeyyy.... Jona-kuuuuuun! Jonathan: What the heck?! Johanne: Tiiiiiiiiime tooooooooo eeeeeeeeeeaaat alreaaaaddyyyy!!!!!!! I cooooooooooooooked yooooouurrr faaaaaavorite!!! Jonathan (wiping his eyes and about to run): AAAAAAAAAHHH!!!!!!! What the fuck?! Johanne: Jonathan, you seemed to be sleepy. You must eat first. Then I have some sake maybe you could drink a little. Jonathan: Soo... was it a dream? Johanne: No. It's just your hallucinations. Were you kinda drugged or something? Jonathan: Yeah... sort of... ---- Meanwhile, while waiting for Hacki almost four hours before, an old hermit-looking man with a long beard approached Joanthan. Unknown man: You feel cold. Jonathan: Yeah. Unknown man: Maybe you could drink this after you changed your clothes. It'll make you feel warm. Jonathan: Sure. I guess. Unknown man: It would make you warm for four hours. Jonathan drank a liquid medicine mixed with water. ---- Johanne: Yeap. You're drugged. Anyway I cooked something we haven't ate since our parents left us. Jonathan (still sleepy): What is it? Johanne: A big-ass Salisbury steak, sizzled. Comes in with some sunny-side up eggs. Jonathan waters his mouth slowly as he listens what is their food. Johanne: And gravy, and fried rice and everything nice... ''--Cue dramatic music--'' Jonathan comes alive and fully free of the effects of the drug. Jonathan: That's just *sobs*... the best *sobs*... food ever!!! How did you do that? Johanne: Mama's cookbook. Jonathan: Why did you cook?! Johanne: I just want to try! Have you forgot you'll let me cook tonight? Jonathan (facefaults): EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEHHHHH????????!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! DID I REALLY ALLOWED YOU TO DO THAT?!!!!! Johanne: See! You were drugged! I saw you blushing earlier. Jonathan: AAWWW.....FUCK! Johanne: Can I just try to cook this time? Jonathan (sighs): Okay, fine. Johanne: Let's eat! Later... Jonathan: That is some great food! Johanne: I can't believe you can actually eat that much?! You're like *this much* from eating away my food! Jonathan just laughs at it while drinking sake. He also gets a bottle of vodka and a glass. Meanwhile, the two are watching a football (soccer for you Americans) game from the window of their house. They also react when their favorite team are getting a goal. Announcer: Bass to Burgdorf, Burgdorf to Jones... and Jones makes the goal! Sapporo team wins the match! Jonathan and Johanne:YAAYY!!! Later, the two decided to sleep. They decided to stay on different rooms however, Johanne dreamt of a fire that would kill everybody, including Jonathan and herself. Johanne woke up and went to Johanne's room. Johanne: Jonathan... Jonathan: What? Johanne: Can I sleep beside you again? Jonathan: If that's what you wish. Turn off the light and you can sleep here. Johanne: Thank you. Jonathan: You'll wrap your arms around me again, don't you? Johanne: Of course, I will. Jonathan: You're too sweet and romantic to be my sister. Johanne: I'm not your sister, sheesh! I think you just went full retard. Never go full retard. ---- Meanwhile far away from the island, a party is going on a ship. << Previous Episode | Next Episode >> Category:Third Age Category:Third Age Episodes